From wongwf@comp.nus.edu.sg Sat Jun 19 13:27:19 1999 Path: sund.iscs.nus.sg!not-for-mail From: Wong Weng Fai Newsgroups: iscs.rec.humour Subject: Signs in China Date: 19 Jun 1999 03:52:58 GMT Organization: SoC, NUS Lines: 48 Sender: Wong Weng Fai Message-ID: <7kf46q$i7c$1@sund.iscs.nus.sg> NNTP-Posting-Host: suna.iscs.nus.sg NNTP-Posting-User: wongwf User-Agent: tin/pre-1.4-981002 ("Phobia") (UNIX) (SunOS/5.5.1 (sun4u)) Xref: sund.iscs.nus.sg iscs.rec.humour:7014 These are suppose to be actual English signs found in China... Uncle Fai ----------------- 1. In a Beijing hotel lobby - The lift is being fixed for next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. 2. In a Shanghai hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk. 3. In a Hangzhou hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid. 4. In a Jilin hotel: You are very invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. 5. In a Wuxi dry cleaner: Please drop your trousers here for best results. 6. Outside a Tianjin clothing shop: Order your summer suits quick. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation. 7. In a Xian tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs. 8. In a Guilin hotel: Because of impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose. 9. An ad by Kunming dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest methodists. 10. In a Hangzhou zoo: Please do not feed animals. If you have suitable food give it to the guard on duty. 11. From a karaoke bar song list in Suzhou: I'd Like to Teach the Wound to Sing; What Kind of Foot Am I. 12. In a Taiyuan bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts. 13. Hainan airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them to all directions. 14. In a Huashan temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman. Even a foreigner if dressed as a man. 15. In a restaurant menu in Harbin: Salad a firm's own make; Limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; Beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.